Mom guilt is real. As a professional coach and mentor for moms across the country, I see the impact of mom guilt every single day.Let’s be honest, no matter how good of a job you’re doing as a mom, there’s still a nagging fear that you’re missing some important detail that could undo all your hard work. Moms around the world are in desperate need of a Mom Guilt intervention.
It’s time to get relief from the continual feeling of doing too much and not doing enough all at the same time. It’s time to end the steady flow of doubts running through your mind every day.No matter how old or how young your kids are, every mom faces opportunities for mom guilt. In one moment the overwhelm from mom guilt will drive you to Facebook for a much-needed break, then the next moment it will shame you for staring at the screen when you could have been spending time with the kids. This same guilt pressures you to sign the kids up for sports and music activities and then won’t let you fully enjoy their practice times or rehearsals because the house is a mess and you have no idea what’s for dinner.Mom guilt robs you of your confidence.Self-doubt is one of the biggest clues that mommy guilt is at work in your life.Mommy guilt weakens your self-confidence causing you to second-guess even the smallest of decisions. You become more and more dependent on the opinions of others. Over time this creates a habit of seeking approval.Mom guilt robs you of connection to others.Guilt thrives in isolation. The ultimate price you pay with mommy guilt is a loss of connection to others. Even though you may see other moms, guilt won’t allow you to share deep meaningful conversations with them. Shame won’t allow you to openly share your thoughts. The easiest way to break guilt’s hold is to stay connected to other people.Mom guilt results from a failure to view the past properly.
Guilt is always about the past. Your mind begins to relive the past, highlighting all the ways you could have handled things differently. Your focus and attention are locked in on things you cannot change while causing you to miss out on what’s happening right now.Instead, choose to search for past for lessons, not losses. Only look at your mistakes from a viewpoint of making today better, not as a reminder of all the ways you’ve messed up.Nothing is more exhausting than trying to live up to the ‘good mom’ image you’re carrying around in your mind. You know the ‘good mom’- she’s the one who is a-l-w-a-y-s prepared, always kind, always on time, always organized, creative, unrushed, and never tired. In short, she’s perfect. The constant comparison of your everyday real life to this fantasy mom creates critical voices in your head that remind you of your mistakes and your inability to measure up to this impossible standard. It’s time to silence the inner critic.Mom guilt is robbing you of your confidence and your connection to others. That’s too high of a price to pay. Remember there’s no such thing as a mom who doesn’t make any mistakes. But there is a perfect mom for your children, and that’s you. You’ve been chosen for this, now choose each day to honor that call by bringing your children the very best of you.
