Bonus Episode 2 – Conversations to have in the midst of these unsettling times

Welcome to the Mentor 4 Moms Podcast!

On this episode:

Today we’re going to be talking about conversations. What important conversations are we having during these times? What conversations do we need to think about having? How are we going to use our words in powerful ways in these times? That’s our conversation today.

One thing I have noticed with our family is that daily we get to remind ourselves, and each other, that God is in control even though things feel out of control. We must not forget to be kind to one another, and to others. None of us has ever dealt with this before. So, we feel unprepared, confused, scared – all very natural reactions because this is unprecedented in every way.

We’re reminding ourselves, and each other, the importance of prayer. If you are looking for a wonderful resource for prayer in these times there is a podcast by my friend, Mary DeMuth, whose been a guest here on this podcast. Her podcast is Pray Every Day. People from around the globe are gathering around that podcast and really finding hope and encouragement and support from her daily prayers.

The last reminder that we have is that the good news of the Word of God is more important than the daily news reports. So, if we find ourselves more glued to our screen for the latest updates on the next level in this tragedy, maybe we should step away.

I had to break the trance of the tragic news and look up again and remember there is more for me in this home – connecting with this family and being present. There is hope for me when I read the Word, when I meditate on the truth of the Word. It was incredible how I felt better even though the circumstances haven’t changed. My heart and my mind began to change.

Let’s talk about conversations we can have with our kids. In our household we have big family issues. Simply because we have that many people in the home, there’s that much food that needs to be consumed, there’s more opportunities for error to impact more than just one. We’re having hand washing, hygiene conversations. We want to make sure we’re all washing our hands properly in this time when it matters so much.

They’re children and will want to do it in a child-like way. Like, “how fast can we do it?” or “how little water or soap can I use?” or “how much soap and water can I use?” In the midst of chaotic times they’re still going to make child type decisions. I want to equip them and also recognize that they’re kids and it just is what it is.

We’re also experiencing the dynamic of independent people coming home to a family routine. I have adult age kids. My daughter came home from NY used to her own time schedule, her own space, her own eating habits. She’s not able to be connected to her friends and the support base she’s built and I’ve had to recognize we’re not her primary emotional support base any more. We’ve had some conversations about the things on her mind – all the uncertainty and desire to return to her routine in NY.

Other conversations we’re having are around how we navigate space. We have many people needing space to do what they need to do. But our home is not where we usually have all these activities going on at the same time. So we’re having conversations about what space is needed and when. Respect is one of our core values and we’re talking about how our core values are lived out in the midst of this time and how we work space for that.

We’re having conversations around limited movement. As more and more news has come out and our movement has been more restricted. It’s been a process of adjusting activities down. We’re having conversations about the importance of being intentional about the places your going and how you’re navigating those spaces to ensure you’re keeping yourself healthy.

Another conversation is, “calm down on the food consumption.” They were excited about all the food I was bringing in as they were on spring break mentality. They wanted to eat all the food all the time. I had to communicate to them that I had plans for this food and wanted to minimize my trips to the grocery store.

I’ve also had to have conversations about leftovers. As I was hearing, “I don’t want that again,” I had to convey that we need to be thankful for what we have and were not going to be wasteful. We still have plenty of food to eat and this is the food we will eat. And we will eat it with a heart of gratitude. We will continue to look for anyone in need and how we can give and be a blessing to them.

Another conversation we’re having is about what’s not happening. Spring break plans we had – not happening. Classes they were involved in not happening in the same way and what will that look like. Gatherings and friends meeting up. Birthday parties. Events they were planning to attend. All these cancellations have been one disappointment after another. Helping them navigate the emotions attached to those disappointments have been constant conversations.

One last big conversation I’m having with my kids is one we just had today. It looks like one of my daughter’s friends has the virus. Her entire family is on lock-down now. It is one thing to hear numbers on the news. It’s another thing to call out a name, someone you know, a friend. It’s a real moment for us. Thankfully she is not needing to be hospitalized at this point and we’re praying for her to recover.

These are just some of the conversations we’re having at our house. I wanted to share those in case they inspire you in talking with your kids. Maybe something we’re saying over here would help you.

Have a listen for to the episode for some other conversations we are having with extended family, conversations I’m having with my husband, and even some conversations we can be having in our community. Pray about what is right for you to say and do in these conversations. Reach out to me if you are looking for resources.

On the next episode we’ll talk about adjusting to time and dealing with time when all our activities are flowing one into the other with everything happening at home. I have some ideas and look forward to talking with you about that.